Ask me a question

Q: I’m deeply convinced my partner needs therapy because of some things s/he went through and the issues s/he has been dealing with ever since, but she always deflects or fails to follow up. How do I help him/her get the help she needs?

Q:I’m single, dating and happen to love giving men head. But I get nervous about doing it too casually with someone I don’t know well, since it’s almost more intimate than sex. How can I protect myself from STIs and in general with new partners? Is giving head with condoms something people actually do, or do you have any other suggestions for safety during oral sex?

Q: I think I’ve had an orgasm, but I’m not positive — how can I tell for sure whether it just felt really good, or it was an actual orgasm?

Q: Is it sanitary for my partner to go down on me after eating/drinking?

Q: I recently started dating a guy whose penis is so large, it’s difficult to fit inside me and actually hurts after sex. Tips?!

Q: A close friend of mine never dates or talks about his sex life. Should I assume s/he’s asexual and leave it alone, or gently offer that I’m open to talking if s/he’s interested? I’m worried s/he’s afraid to come out and want to make sure s/he knows I’m a safe space.

Q: I’m a new mom, and my sex drive is practically nonexistent. How long after vaginal birth should we wait? How and when will my partner and I even pull it off with a newborn in the house?! How long will this go on for?

Q: How can I increase my chances of squirting during sex/orgasm?

Q: I’m a trans woman navigating the dating world. At what point, if any, do I need to let partners know that I still have a penis? (Let’s direct answers towards trans men and women regardless of whether they’re planning on having gender confirmation surgery.)

Q: How do I clean my body/prepare before anal play?

Q: The more I use my vibrator, the harder it is to come without it — should I be worried? (Let’s be sure to give tips for people who don’t want to be vibrator dependent, but also let them know it’s OK to use toys/accessories!)

Q: My S.O. is an introvert, but I love being social, and it’s wearing on our relationship. Help! (Let’s give some specific advice for how to talk to your S.O. if you have different preferences, as well as practical/actionable solutions — e.g. alternate weeks, so that every other week you’re doing something for the other person, whether that’s going out in a group or spending a quiet night in.)